Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

Let’s make wagons great again – and I could fit tons of red hats back here

By Shahzad Sheikh

Click below now to watch my Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

If you’re looking for a review do as I just said and hit the above to play the video. There you’ll get the facts about a new version of the XF saloon from Jaguar with a long rear roofline making it not an estate, not a wagon, not even a shooting brake, but a Sportsbrake.

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

Yes, they sell them here. Nope, I’ve never seen one either. Apart from this one. And yep that makes them rare, and standout and ultimately, cool. They start at about AED230,000 for a 2.0 and around 300k for a 3.0 with all-wheel drive. That’s only about 10k more than the saloon versions – so get this.

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

Drop all the rear seats for a crossover-embarrassing level of cargo capacity  and wave your hand in the air like you just don’t care to open and close the panoramic roof blind. There’s thumping performance, a thumping sound system and thumping build quality – this is not the bad old days of Jag’s distant dodgy past.

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

Why do you buy an SUV? You need extra space to carry stuff? This has got loads of capacity. You want it to be comfortable for passengers? I can easily fit my 6ft 2-ness behind my imaginary self with wiggle margin to spare. You want all-wheel drive, yeah check that off, the torque on this version rotates all four spindles.

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

You want the ‘Sports’ part of a Sports Utility Vehicle (SUV)? Actually there’s no such thing, unless you’re talking Rangie Sport, and okay Cayenne and… oh…. Trackhawk (say that in a low hushed and awed tone of reverence).

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

But aside from those, what’s more sporty than a low-slung thing with a centre of gravity below sea level not at birds eye, and extra mass behind the rear axle adding pendulumacity to the handling – don’t bother looking up the word, I just created it (breaths on and polishes fingernails smugly).

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

Oh you want something tall to make it easier to step in and out of? Get a bus pass, or maybe you’re old enough to qualify for a free one if they do that here? Or maybe I’m just a terrible ageist, which would be absurd because I’m sporting a white goatee and groan like my granddad used to each time I get up from prostration.

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

Okay fine, there’s a place for SUVs. But don’t count out saloon cars just yet, and don’t dismiss their elongated cousins with the child-bearing D-pillars, because they are just awesome. And this Jag Sportsbrake is awesome. And you’re awesome if you have one.

And we’re all uncool sad-arses cause we don’t.

Jaguar XF Sportsbrake review

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